Today I followed a thread on IQ tests on a friend’s Facebook timeline. I’ve never taken an IQ test – nor I’m interested in taking one. But out of curiosity, I searched for a practice test and was directed here.
Instead of the pie, I dissected the syntactical and analytical substance of the question.
First, the question assumes that all pies are identical, made in a standard, round form pie. What if I don’t conform and make a square pie? Why should I conform in my baking? Nothing says that a pie has to be round. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, a pie is
1) a meat dish baked with biscuit or pastry crust;
2) a dessert consisting of a filling (as of fruit or custard) in a pastry shell or topped with pastry or both.
No mention of roundness.
In my opinion, intelligence is, first of all, the ability to think autonomously. Hence, my pie is square. So, I can’t make diameter cuts. [See how standardized tests (don’t) work in school?]
Secondly, the question doesn’t take into account the content of the pie. You can easily make four neat cuts in a solid pie, such as a pumpkin pie. What about a pie with a very soft, semi-liquid filling, like an apple pie whose filling turned out not thick enough? I will have a mess, random pieces of squashed pie, with the filling trying to escape and confounding any possible separation in pieces. (Have the IQ test designers ever baked a pie?)
Also, what if my knife is not sharp enough? And what if I start texting while cutting the pie and I cut the tip of my index finger? Will my cut finger count as an extra-piece or as extra-filling? (Do not text while cutting a pie!)
Finally, the word pie is also used metaphorically as
1) affair or business (“She wanted her finger … in every possible social pie” — Mary Deasy) and 2) as a whole regarded as divisible into shares (“Giving the less fortunate … a larger share of the economic pie” — R. M. Hutchins).
As for #1, cutting the “social (media) pie” of the 21st century means to defriend our politically incompatible friends. It just requires a click. No diameter cuts are necessary.
And in #2, it’s no longer time, when the 1% is disproportionately more fortunate than the remaining 99%, to share any “economic pie.” They refuse to cut the pie. The whole pie, round or square, is just one indivisible share.
So, I’ll never be able to take an IQ test because my (over) analysis of each question will take way more than the 20 second-time limit before my IQ count starts lowering. My baking works better without “measuring cups.”